Great Weddings


I tried f-double o-k and f-e-c-k

so get forked.

Go big or go home. My own allocation:

  • 1.5 years of pre-wedding honeymoon
  • 2 x weddings, 1 x Melbourne and 1 x Nicaragua
  • Buck’s parties in Melbourne (1 day) and Mexico City (4 days)
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Best Wedding -
Small morning wedding ceremony at 9am followed by an all you can eat breakfast reception at a restaurant by the beach near tooradin area at around 9:30-10:00am (cermony was 15mins). As a dad with a little one, perfect time. They had kids too so wanted it quick.

A greek/Italian one I went to where the ceremony was at lunch time. The reception was at 5:30pm about 30min-1hr drive from the wedding. Couldnt go home as it was 1hr from our house so we sat at a venue the booked and had to buy our own drinks while we waited.

Went to Regent theatre for the reception but they were running behind so there was 100-150people cramped in the waiting bay. Once you got in there the cold meats were warm and slimey and they only had bottled softdrink dumped on tables and all alcohol drinks were pay for your own.

My wedding was a quick afternoon ceremony where the reception was. While photos were taken, the waiters catered snacks before we went in for the reception.

I hate weddings where you have a long wait between the ceremony and reception. Anything more than 2hrs AND you have to pay for your own snacks and drinks is a joke.

Also at receptions, have a tab… at least beer, Wine, softdrink.

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Went to a mate’s 2nd wedding last year. Was at a small country church out of Geelong. Church was done up as a restaurant. Ceremony held amongst the trees out the back. Followed by a food trailer with woodfire pizzas rolling out non-stop for about 90 mins. Home brew beer and wine in numerous wheelbarrows around a few marquees. Bocce, cricket, quoits, and a few other lawn games.
Main meal in the church catered for.
Mate and his new bride slept out there.

Awesome, relaxed atmosphere.

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A church is a good place…they say the 3 things on a bride’s mind are

  • Aisle
  • Altar
  • Hymn

Now just say the three words



Do you people want your crowd to get ■■■■-eyed?
Cos that’s how you get a crowd ■■■■-eyed.

We had a 2-2.5 hour gap between wedding and reception in 2 different locations BUT the reception was in the CBD so most people went home between or to a friend’s to drink and caught the train in.

We also had karaoke so it was awesome.

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Karaoke is ok. But the whole catching a train in to the reception and if you had to buy your own drinks and food at the Karaoke would be a downer.

One wedding I went to was a 40min drive to the ceremony near Greensborough and we had a 3 hour wait before having the reception in the at night so we did end up going home for 2 hours before leaving again.

Incredible idea.
I would have been all over it.

Oh it was a proper reception place. 3 course meal with hors d’oeuvre and cake and beer/wine/soft drink included. We just hired a DJ that could do karoke.

Best was in early Jan this year. My nephew married one of the daughters of an Adelaide hotelier. Great get together on Friday night in one of their pubs, bus to their private gardens in the Adelaide hills for the weeding and reception… Bar open on arrival prior to ceremony, than roving entrees after ceremony, bar in operation. Relaxed sit down dinner in marquee, Great food, good band and plenty of beer and wine flowing all night. Buses from midnight back to hotel where most guests were staying.

Only downside was drive home on Sunday.

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That would have been a hell of a job. And a bit of an imposition, if you ask me.


Not a problem, not a weed in site in the wedding garden!!

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Speaking from experience don’t babysit your infant niece the week of your wedding.

While she might not be symptomatic yet, she could still have gastro.

Yes, both my wife and I spent our wedding day enjoying the wonders of gastro.

The niece has grown up to be a right little cow as well.