Thank you, your suggestions are very well considered and we have certainly tried exploring this over the years. Many friends suggested that our daughter join up with oher kids like her but it’s a pretty shallow pool. We organised a meetup with a family with a girl around the same age (late High School) but its clear that expecting two children with one shared experience, and that being the thing they both don’t like about themselves, doesn’t have a high success rate. Volleyball petered out as she could train with the girls but was not allowed to play any of the games. She did just get a great bit of news though. I’m biased but she is a talented artist and animator and was just awarded a film prize for a short animated film she made on her own over the course of over a year. She has been slected to travel to an international film festival to show her film in a months time so she may make some connections there.
Brilliant, maybe check if there are other young directors coming from around Melbourne (I’m guessing it’s your hometown) for a meetup prior. Plenty of artists suffer but it’s not what you want for your child. I still reckon you could put the hard word on the debating parents- just for something lowkey to know people are around, speaker preparation over a meal or something.
FWIW
I’m guessing that your daughter is more mature, self aware, comfortable in her own skin than most adolescents her own age. As captain of her own ship, she could be way ahead of them and find them a bit boring with their insecurities about their identities.
Maybe at this stage she could feel more comfortable with older people who share her interests in film making or other skills she has developed. As to sport, maybe developing skills as a trainer or coaching, where gender is irrelevant, learn teaching skills from you?
I appreciate that life could be lonely if she hasn’t found a social group to fit in with, but hang in there, she’s got a lot going for her and there is great diversity in the wider world where she could belong in a social group where gender isn’t entry to a group, instead of trying to fit in with others.
All the best for you and your daughter. You obviously encourage her, which not every parent does.
Your post reminded me of my close family friends trans daughter. She also suffered deeply from isolation and lack of friendship. She joined a teen LGBTQ+ group where she started to make friends with peers who were also understanding their identity. Not sure if thats an option for your daughter? Our family friend just visited and has flourished as her authentic self - she is studying law and joined the public service. All very accepting and supportive.
I wish the best for you and your daughter. I hope your cancer is treatable.
Thank you so much , nothing like the kindness of strangers, appreciate your words and advice
We are currently based overseas in a country that is quite poor but very accepting overall. She will graduate this year and we will work our way back to Melbourne. Once there we are hoping she may find her tribe there. The docs believe my cancer was caught early so I’m tracking well with a good prognosis. Thank you for your kind thoughts and advice
I hope so. Schools can be very small places. The world is much bigger - you can choose your friends from everyone, rather than living in a cage with the same 60 people every day. Of course my experiences are a couple of decades old, but most of my gender-non-standard mates really only got comfortable and found themselves and fellow travellers once they got out of the school hothouse (especially because it’s probably stuffed full of people who remember her before the transition) and headed to uni. Being nonconforming in SOME way or other was practically expected there. If that’s the lifepath your daughter will be following, there’s some pretty good reason to hope she’ll find some friendly faces there.
Fark Cancer dude. You can beat it. I give you to you all the mental strength you need to win.
Im doing well mate, I count myself very fortunate, just need to be vigilant. I intend to live at least long enough to see Essendon win another flag which of course means I wish to live a very loooong time
My dad said this around 5 years ago. Mid 80s now, he might need to crack the ton
Any room in here for depressed Americans with election hangover?
0[quote=“StealthBomber, post:3327, topic:12185, full:true”]
Any room in here for depressed Americans with election hangover?
[/quote]
Yes.
Does anyone have any tips on managing anxiety? Other than medication.
Please and thank you
Not gonna lie… I’m flat as a tack and have been for three days. I am really worried about what all this means. I don’t think I need to go through the laundry list of reasons why this result sucks, and I don’t really want to bring all my baggage from the politics thread here. I’m just in a real bad way about this. I hate that farking orange abortion so so much and I thought I might finally never have to see his face again.
Allow yourself to feel flat and discouraged. Perfectly normal reaction to the circumstances you find yourself in.
Maybe start reminding yourself of all the good, nice things that you are seeing (no matter how small or seemingly insignificant) or experiencing. Hopefully, over time, the good things will start to dominate your thoughts.
Be kind to yourself, and, of course, seek professional help if you find you need to talk to someone to give you better guidance.
Do you have an EAP service or ability to have a chat with someone about how you feel mate?
Might sound really basic but perhaps put on some soothing music and music that reminds you of the things you love and takes you as far away from thinking of politics and the state of world and go for a long slow walk and get plenty of fresh air. I also find swimming, not doing laps but just splashing around, super relaxing.
It’s what I do when I’m feeling overwhelmed and it has helped me a lot.
I wish I had the answer. I’ve lived with, what has been at times, debilitating anxiety.
I have sought professional help. Medication hasn’t helped me but has helped others
If you haven’t spoken to your GP, perhaps that’s a good start. You can get a mental health plan.
Techniques- box breathing, I sometimes wear an elastic band on my wrist and flick it to ground myself if I am highly anxious. Counting. I do an exercise to see 5 things, hear 5 things to ground myself.
Then try and work out what i have control of and can deal with and what I can’t. Often times my anxiety is related to things I don’t have control on.
It’s awful but things can get better. I hope you get some help to assist.
Perfect response. I have debilitating anxiety and box breathing, limiting caffeine to one coffe early in the morning and nothing else. If I feel like a coke every now and again I will have a zero sugar caffeine free.
I walk everyday, got off social media and I’m cautious about the things that trigger my anxiety. Driving on the ring road is a major trigger so I avoid it during peak time (sounds silly but I’ve logged my triggers)
I meditate. I was told to do it for years, didn’t as I thought I was too cool and as soon as I started I felt it lowers my anxiety significantly
Really like the two replies to your post. Clearly good people who care. I concur.
Another approach, although not necessarily as palatable as their wise words is to take it head on. I watched the Joe Rogan interview with him just prior to the election and it changed my impression of him in many respects. Again, not necessarily palatable for you, but settled some concerns.
Cheers