What a massive intra-club suspension I have faced. I feel like Jake Carlisle; I’m pretty much just a massive ■■■■ with very small testicles.
Anyway; I’ve continued to monitor the bomberblitz situation and I would like to summarise my thoughts and observations over the offseason
- James Kelly is contracted and I’m banished. Laughter and embarrassment ensue.
- The draft happens. We get McGrath. This is the day in history when bomberblitz will note panic dollar foundations were set yet nobody knew just how farking crazy it was gonna get. The term hasn’t taken off yet.
- Watson tells AFL house to gagf and launches his return and the women’s league by wearing the “feminist” hat like a boss. I cry with blitz!
- McGrath is anointed better than Zerrett, worse than mccluggage and a back pocket all at the same time. Confusion and madness continues.
- Dodoro is scorned; he is lauded; he wears jackets like a boss!
- We draft the next champions of Essendon. Who the heck is that weird tall skinny guy, why didn’t we draft Josh Battle and Dodoro just does whatever Boris Bewick says? Sack Dudoro; all hail Dodoro.
- Training reports are like gold; thank you
- Our squad creates a lot of optimism and hype. Josh green has a good preseason and now we all forget he was that Brisbane d$ck (me included)
- Jackson Merrett is still a battler. Sorry.
- Joe Daniher kicks a goal from 45m on the right foot at the true value solar system and immediately trolls everyone on his new strategy.
- PANIC dollars spreads like the clap; JaKeBrady thinks Francis has done an ACL. I get angry; am silenced by my ban; people spend panic dollars. Then Francis starts running; he is back from the dead like the messiah that he is.
- PANIC dollars the game is started. WTF! I have no idea what is going on but all I know is that I am all in on Francis.
- Blitz has full meltdowns periodically and BSD and tells everyone to shut up and bring perspective. I love it.
- BBB : Big boy Begley happens. bomberblitz has a massive erection. Paul Peos sensibly highlights his contract status and panic dollars are spent. Parish is leaving and everything is farked. Oops nope, it’s not, how did we get the best player in the draft at 31. BBB forever.
Then I wasn’t unbanned on March 1. Delayed comeback story. Then NEW Blitz.
And then Zerret and Parish got 1, 2 in the Brownlow.
Thanks for having me back