It is definitely a major worry. The police turning away women who are seeking help has been a contributing factor. Social attitudes need to change, but so does the law, to protect.
For those interested, here are the submissions to the recent Royal Commission into Family Violence. There are a lot of submissions/perspectives:
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Violence is violence. Sure, domestic violence is a particularly dark and sinister subset of that, but it all comes from the same place.
Sadly, violence is part of our culture, our history and our evolution. Itâs in our DNA. We evolved from animals, and you only need a cursory look at the animal Kingdom to see that violence = survival. It was like that for much of human history too, no matter how much our structured society makes us forget it. Which is why I never understand comments like âwhat is the world coming to,â because surely on a per capita basis, this is the safest time in human history to live. Just because we hear about everything these days, doesnât mean itâs increasing.
Itâs a tool open for anybody to use. The only thing that differs is each personâs threshold to use it. Which is where any education needs to be focused.
You canât just educate that âviolence is bad,â because itâs usually an irrational action. What needs to be educated is dealing with the impulses and the triggers.
On a more specific note to the thread, young boys need to be educated and taught coping mechanisms for such things as rejection, insecurities and heartbreak. More importantly, they need to be taught the difference between a broken heart, and a broken ego, and why theyâre not the same thing.
If violence really was seen as an unattractive and unacceptable trait, then maybe it would eventually be bred out of society to some extent. Sadly, that doesnât really seem to be the case.
Edit. Sorry, that post is all over the shop. It was originally much longer, but I lost a bit of flow in the editing process
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Friends with a cop who is just happy it is finally being reported. Used to find it hard to believe when she told me how often people were killed by their partners.
Humans gonna be humans
Nothing will change until Australia changes its alcohol and illicit drug culture and that requires a complete generational shift in behavior.Education is a waste of time and money in my opinion. Everyone knows from 5 years of age that its wrong.
However it can make governments seem like they are doing something so I guess thatâs the path they will take and then they will pat themselves on the back and move onto something else.
All the studies show that violence (domestic or otherwise) is from someone who has the mental predisposition to be violent. While alcohol or drugs are factors they are not drivers of the violent actions. Basically violent people do violent things, and we have all seen this growing up.
Further in these studies it shows that violence is always part of the perpetrators mental condition that is exacerbated by upbringing and environment.
Proven that children from violent homes with abusive parents as role models are more certain to be abusive themselves.
Education does work, and the gender roles are vital in equality.
So DT, donât be flippant and cynical, the Government programs are based on years of study. Not everyone does know it is wrong and watching Dad smack Mum justifies it.
So continue to teach your kids and donât raise your voice or hand to anyone, as they are watching and learning.
Nothing will change until Australia changes its alcohol and illicit drug culture and that requires a complete generational shift in behavior.Excellent point on the booze culture. It is definitely a huge contributing factor.Education is a waste of time and money in my opinion. Everyone knows from 5 years of age that its wrong.
However it can make governments seem like they are doing something so I guess thatâs the path they will take and then they will pat themselves on the back and move onto something else.
However with the education point, youâd be absolutely stunned at how many people think it is a-okay to beat up on someone you disagree with. Yes, schools teach kids not to do it, but when it happens all the time at home it becomes seen as normal behaviour.
Just turn on the television and youâll see our glorification of violence.
With all the crap pumped into them from almost every angle, from watching our politicians, to listening to music, to going to the movies, to turning on the tv, to watching the corporate world, to watching behaviours at school, to seeing stuff at home, or in friends homes, etc etc etc, itâs almost unrealistic to expect any other outcome.
Major, major change is required. Not just dollars and seminars.
Nothing will change until Australia changes its alcohol and illicit drug culture and that requires a complete generational shift in behavior.Excellent point on the booze culture. It is definitely a huge contributing factor.Education is a waste of time and money in my opinion. Everyone knows from 5 years of age that its wrong.
However it can make governments seem like they are doing something so I guess thatâs the path they will take and then they will pat themselves on the back and move onto something else.However with the education point, youâd be absolutely stunned at how many people think it is a-okay to beat up on someone you disagree with. Yes, schools teach kids not to do it, but when it happens all the time at home it becomes seen as normal behaviour.
Booze and Drugs do not make non-violent people suddenly violent. Agree it makes some people lose control quicker, but they are already violent types and it starts when they are very young,
Agreed. Correlation v causation and all that. But the prevalence and acceptance of boozing on at the end of the day does heighten the incidences. Source: very good friend who is high up the 000 call taking chain; whenever both police and ambo are required, there is always someone drunk there.
agree with others that violence is violence and itâs an issue across multiple fronts.
For me it ultimately comes down to what is the incentive, or in this case what is there as an incentive for people not to use violence ? ( couldnât think of the right wording so yeah)
Threat of jail time ? thatâs nothing now and takes 10 plus goes for the justice system to take things seriously.
Itâs the old itâs easier to ask for forgiveness than permission thing. people nowadays know they can con the system for bad behaviour so they do what they want, then go to court and say oh iâm sorry iâm really a good person, get people to put on a piece of paper how wonderful this person is and wala.
At worst they may serve a bit of time.
then they just use the same con on the parole board and they fall for it.
so what exactly is the incentive not to do bad things ? thatâs an honest question cos at the end of the day, it really is just dumb luck or a lottery system as to whether youâll be punished or not.
Sure weâve all got stories but i know someone who was in a domestic violent situation. She got out. 30 odd breaking intervention orders later, plus death threats etc etc the patner was put in jail for a couple of months for one thing or another.
Got out was due back in court to face the 30 odd charges 2 months later after yet again terrorising this poor lady, then at the hearing this wonderful person didnât like the prosecutor so he attacked him and a cop in court.
Now doubt now that heâs done it to a cop itâll be taken seriously, but otherwise heâd prolly be out again.
The do gooders of this world have alot to answer for. In their pursuit for oh everyone has the same rights bullshit, they are actually giving free reign to people who abuse that right.
Weâve just turned into mini 'merica.
At one time I spent many hours in our local Magistrates Court being an advocate for some disadvantaged citizens.
I was always amazed when a guy charged with assault of his partner, breaking her arm, her nose and kicking her multiple times, contravening intervention orders, and with a long previous history was not jailed. While the truck driver who drove after losing his licence for DUI, so he could feed his kids was given three months in jail.
I saw matters like this every week, and the Police were so frustrated, and often commented that next time it may be much more serious. They were usually correct.
I asked a Magistrate I knew from Heidelberg Court, and he advised that usually they didnât want to break up families and that these domestic violence matters were complicated with fault on all sides. I told him this was horseshit but they continue to let violent people walk our streets.
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At one time I spent many hours in our local Magistrates Court being an advocate for some disadvantaged citizens.I was always amazed when a guy charged with assault of his partner, breaking her arm, her nose and kicking her multiple times, contravening intervention orders, and with a long previous history was not jailed. While the truck driver who drove after losing his licence for DUI, so he could feed his kids was given three months in jail.
I saw matters like this every week, and the Police were so frustrated, and often commented that next time it may be much more serious. They were usually correct.
I asked a Magistrate I knew from Heidelberg Court, and he advised that usually they didnât want to break up families and that these domestic violence matters were complicated with fault on all sides. I told him this was horseshit but they continue to let violent people walk our streets.
Yep when i was a cop saw this all the time. Attitudes of the court need to change.
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While Iâm on board with the sentiment on sentencing, it is totally shutting the gate after the horse has beaten itâs wife to death. And Iâm not so sure the type of moron who beats up on his partner thinks much further than a few seconds into the future, so in essence would be immune to the disincentive of a prison sentence.
While I'm on board with the sentiment on sentencing, it is totally shutting the gate after the horse has beaten it's wife to death. And I'm not so sure the type of moron who beats up on his partner thinks much further than a few seconds into the future, so in essence would be immune to the disincentive of a prison sentence.You're making the mistake of categorising everyone who does something bad as a totally bad and extremely stupid person. Not always the case. Often the perpetrators are otherwise quite normal and lead quite normal lives, sometimes it's literally the only facet of their lives they show any aggression or violence.
Education is massive, and letting the men who do it know that itâs not acceptable at any point, in any situation is much more important.
At one time I spent many hours in our local Magistrates Court being an advocate for some disadvantaged citizens.I was always amazed when a guy charged with assault of his partner, breaking her arm, her nose and kicking her multiple times, contravening intervention orders, and with a long previous history was not jailed. While the truck driver who drove after losing his licence for DUI, so he could feed his kids was given three months in jail.
I saw matters like this every week, and the Police were so frustrated, and often commented that next time it may be much more serious. They were usually correct.
I asked a Magistrate I knew from Heidelberg Court, and he advised that usually they didnât want to break up families and that these domestic violence matters were complicated with fault on all sides. I told him this was horseshit but they continue to let violent people walk our streets.
Yep when i was a cop saw this all the time. Attitudes of the court need to change.
Havenât moved on from women being property.
While I'm on board with the sentiment on sentencing, it is totally shutting the gate after the horse has beaten it's wife to death. And I'm not so sure the type of moron who beats up on his partner thinks much further than a few seconds into the future, so in essence would be immune to the disincentive of a prison sentence.You're making the mistake of categorising everyone who does something bad as a totally bad and extremely stupid person. Not always the case. Often the perpetrators are otherwise quite normal and lead quite normal lives, sometimes it's literally the only facet of their lives they show any aggression or violence.Education is massive, and letting the men who do it know that itâs not acceptable at any point, in any situation is much more important.
And letting the women (and men) on the recieving end know that itâs not acceptable at any point.
While I'm on board with the sentiment on sentencing, it is totally shutting the gate after the horse has beaten it's wife to death. And I'm not so sure the type of moron who beats up on his partner thinks much further than a few seconds into the future, so in essence would be immune to the disincentive of a prison sentence.You're making the mistake of categorising everyone who does something bad as a totally bad and extremely stupid person. Not always the case. Often the perpetrators are otherwise quite normal and lead quite normal lives, sometimes it's literally the only facet of their lives they show any aggression or violence.Education is massive, and letting the men who do it know that itâs not acceptable at any point, in any situation is much more important.
Not a mistake. If you at any point, in any mental state, believe that a problem you have with your partner can be solved by hitting them, you are a class A dipshit.
Thereâs no excuse. Ever.
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While I'm on board with the sentiment on sentencing, it is totally shutting the gate after the horse has beaten it's wife to death. And I'm not so sure the type of moron who beats up on his partner thinks much further than a few seconds into the future, so in essence would be immune to the disincentive of a prison sentence.You're making the mistake of categorising everyone who does something bad as a totally bad and extremely stupid person. Not always the case. Often the perpetrators are otherwise quite normal and lead quite normal lives, sometimes it's literally the only facet of their lives they show any aggression or violence.Education is massive, and letting the men who do it know that itâs not acceptable at any point, in any situation is much more important.
Not a mistake. If you at any point, in any mental state, believe that a problem you have with your partner can be solved by hitting them, you are a class A dipshit.Thereâs no excuse. Ever.
So taking this to the nth degree, whatâs your solution?
âDonât be a dipshitâ.
Seems workable.
Treating people - even, no, particularly if theyâve done something heinous - like theyâre not people or they have no hope of learning or redeeming themselves is not going to lead to a solution.
They need to be punished, they need to learn and accept what theyâve done is wrong, and learn how to do better.
Weâre heading towards the same point HAP (education), just in wildly different manners.
I donât think harsher sentencing will solve anything because idiots donât think ahead to consequences of their actions. Letâs educate the idiots about how violence makes things bad and they shouldnât do it.
Heal the idiots, HAP.
(please donât apply this solution to the Draft/Trade board, otherwise I might actually have to do some work)