Forgotten Footy Folklore

Good yarn. It seemed believable until Round 7 2009, they were playing Freo on the Gold Coast.
Why would Carlton be playing Freo on the Gold Coast?
And also master coach Brett Ratten...LOL

to promote the game in preparation for the Gold Coast to have their own side soon.
https://afltables.com/afl/stats/games/2009/030820090509.html

Master coach Brett Ratten might be a slight exaggeration on my part.

In 2008 Brendan Fevola had gotten himself into a little strife.

His marriage had broken down, and his missus had advised him that his baby daughter was actually fathered by someone else. (A Carlton board member at the time)

Fev decided the grog and the punt were the best forms of release, and he set about partying pretty hard in his new single life.

Plenty of nights he didn't get home to Cheltenham where he lived, crashing at a variety of places near town.

On-field he kicked 99 goals, so the club turned a blind eye to his lifestyle, because he was getting results.

However, eventually the combination of grog and gambling took its toll, grog being the enemy of good judgement at the best of times, and gambling being a subject best left to the clear thinkers.

His lack of clear thinking led him to borrow money from colourful local identities, who were also supporters of the club.

It appears Fev had the impression they wouldn't want their money back. Or at least,t hey could wait for it.

But they did. And they wouldn't.

Breaking his legs was discussed, but as Carlton supporters they ended up settling on another plan.

Bet on Fev not performing, and get the money back that way.

So Fev was instructed that there would be some weeks where he wouldn't perform to his utmost.

Round 7 2009, they were playing Freo on the Gold Coast, and this game was identified as the game to make it happen.

Tens of thousands of dollars were bet on Fev, coming off 8 the week before against Hawthorn, to kick only one goal.

Unthinkable against the lowly Dockers.

He led, marked and kicked a point.

He led again, marked and kicked a goal, then left the ground, apparently injured.

But he was fine. He trained the house down and prepared for the big game against the Pies the next week.

However, all that money bet on him kicking 1 had ended up bringing down the odds.

So his benefactors needed him to 'perform' one more time, this time on one of footy's biggest stages.

This time they backed him to kick None against Collingwood at the G.

Fev was playing Full Forward but ventured so far up the ground there was no way any of his possessions were ever going to get near goal.

Eventually master coach Brett Ratten took him off and he stayed off, having not kicked a goal.

And his debts were declared: Paid.

The AFL had an investigation into the allegations, brought to them by the sponsor, a large betting company who had lost money on the sting.

But the AFL, using the best investigative powers found nothing untoward and cleared everyone of the allegations.

Fevola, coming off 99 goals and then 89 goals (with 2 games not trying) was traded to Brisbane at the end of the year. 

 

 

 

* Some or all of this may not be the truth. But it is footy folklore.

Yes well, the bit about the child being fathered by a board member is definitely false..

His kids look identical to him, except the eldest which was fathered by one of my good mates..

Unfortunately he committed suicide at Carrum train station in the late 90s..

He was a complete badass and used to run amok throughout Frankston with Sam Soloman who was a complete tool..

 

In 2008 Brendan Fevola had gotten himself into a little strife.

His marriage had broken down, and his missus had advised him that his baby daughter was actually fathered by someone else. (A Carlton board member at the time)

Fev decided the grog and the punt were the best forms of release, and he set about partying pretty hard in his new single life.

Plenty of nights he didn't get home to Cheltenham where he lived, crashing at a variety of places near town.

On-field he kicked 99 goals, so the club turned a blind eye to his lifestyle, because he was getting results.

However, eventually the combination of grog and gambling took its toll, grog being the enemy of good judgement at the best of times, and gambling being a subject best left to the clear thinkers.

His lack of clear thinking led him to borrow money from colourful local identities, who were also supporters of the club.

It appears Fev had the impression they wouldn't want their money back. Or at least,t hey could wait for it.

But they did. And they wouldn't.

Breaking his legs was discussed, but as Carlton supporters they ended up settling on another plan.

Bet on Fev not performing, and get the money back that way.

So Fev was instructed that there would be some weeks where he wouldn't perform to his utmost.

Round 7 2009, they were playing Freo on the Gold Coast, and this game was identified as the game to make it happen.

Tens of thousands of dollars were bet on Fev, coming off 8 the week before against Hawthorn, to kick only one goal.

Unthinkable against the lowly Dockers.

He led, marked and kicked a point.

He led again, marked and kicked a goal, then left the ground, apparently injured.

But he was fine. He trained the house down and prepared for the big game against the Pies the next week.

However, all that money bet on him kicking 1 had ended up bringing down the odds.

So his benefactors needed him to 'perform' one more time, this time on one of footy's biggest stages.

This time they backed him to kick None against Collingwood at the G.

Fev was playing Full Forward but ventured so far up the ground there was no way any of his possessions were ever going to get near goal.

Eventually master coach Brett Ratten took him off and he stayed off, having not kicked a goal.

And his debts were declared: Paid.

The AFL had an investigation into the allegations, brought to them by the sponsor, a large betting company who had lost money on the sting.

But the AFL, using the best investigative powers found nothing untoward and cleared everyone of the allegations.

Fevola, coming off 99 goals and then 89 goals (with 2 games not trying) was traded to Brisbane at the end of the year. 

 

 

 

* Some or all of this may not be the truth. But it is footy folklore.

Yes well, the bit about the child being fathered by a board member is definitely false..

His kids look identical to him, except the eldest which was fathered by one of my good mates..

Unfortunately he committed suicide at Carrum train station in the late 90s..

He was a complete badass and used to run amok throughout Frankston with Sam Soloman who was a complete tool..

 

thats full on

Please remember, these are footy folklore.

I, personally, cannot verify any of this.

(Well, apart from the first one which my dad features in, I can verify that)

 

The story goes that Matthew Primus got drafted by Fitzroy with the 2nd pick in the National Draft, having developed late, as some big men seem to, and played some senior footy at Norwood.

Late in the season the Lions were up against the Crows in Adelaide, and the impressionable youngster was paired up with Simon Atkins as his room mate at the hotel.

Atkins was pleased to be catching up with his twin brother Paul, a former Sydney Swan who was now playing in the SANFL.

The Lions played the Crows and were resoundingly thrashed and the boys went out on the town to drown some sorrows, Martin Pike leading the charge, being a local boy with a reputation for knowing which pubs to go to in Adelaide for a good time.

At some point the Atkins brothers disappeared and eventually the young, impressionable, Primus made his way back to the hotel room, with chaperone Pikey.

He opened his door to find one Atkins brother balls deep in the other one. Being identical twins made it nigh on impossible in the moment to determine which was actually up the other, but at that point our boy Matty wasn't fussed, his upbringing told him this was wrong on a number of levels.

The rumour also continues that Martin Pike, who had been with Primus immediately before, was still in the hallway and heard Primus' shriek of (let's call it) surprise. He called out to ask if everything was all right. Matty was speechless. In the words of Marsellus Wallce in the movie that came out a couple of years before, Pulp Fiction,  "No man, I'm pretty farkin far from OK".

Jebus!

I have to ask - according to folklore where did he sleep that night?

I have definitely heard that rumour before, but never described in that way! The Atkins were Tassie boys so it may add merit to the story.

I was wondering if the Atkins story was going to get a mention.

I’ve heard that so many times… It can’t be right.

I have to ask - according to folklore where did he sleep that night?

That is not recorded in the annals of history.

 

 

 

(Yes, I chose the words 'annals' deliberately.)

How about the old one from early 80's about Ricky Barham from the Pies & Michael Turner from the Cats having their way with a woman who had her head stuck in a car door window?

 

The story was that they were in the car together with the passenger window down & she was leaning in from outside & they deliberately closed the window, so that her head was stuck inside the car, while she was still standing. They then jumped out of the car & did the business while she was helplessly stuck.

What’s the one about a particular news presenter and a coke bottle?

Vanda rocking up to Sheeds place for a meeting carrying a slab.

How about the old one from early 80's about Ricky Barham from the Pies & Michael Turner from the Cats having their way with a woman who had her head stuck in a car door window?

 

The story was that they were in the car together with the passenger window down & she was leaning in from outside & they deliberately closed the window, so that her head was stuck inside the car, while she was still standing. They then jumped out of the car & did the business while she was helplessly stuck.

thought that it was turner and dennis lenaghan? Isn't that why his nickname was "windows"..................

Even though the above story is flat-out rape, it’s still not the worst rumour I’ve heard about Michael Turner.

What's the one about a particular news presenter and a coke bottle?

Keyte and J Diesel.
DON'T YOU KNOW IT'S CRYING SHAME
Think it's bullshit though....

Please remember, these are footy folklore.
I, personally, cannot verify any of this.
(Well, apart from the first one which my dad features in, I can verify that)
The story goes that Matthew Primus got drafted by Fitzroy with the 2nd pick in the National Draft, having developed late, as some big men seem to, and played some senior footy at Norwood.
Late in the season the Lions were up against the Crows in Adelaide, and the impressionable youngster was paired up with Simon Atkins as his room mate at the hotel.
Atkins was pleased to be catching up with his twin brother Paul, a former Sydney Swan who was now playing in the SANFL.
The Lions played the Crows and were resoundingly thrashed and the boys went out on the town to drown some sorrows, Martin Pike leading the charge, being a local boy with a reputation for knowing which pubs to go to in Adelaide for a good time.
At some point the Atkins brothers disappeared and eventually the young, impressionable, Primus made his way back to the hotel room, with chaperone Pikey.
He opened his door to find one Atkins brother balls deep in the other one. Being identical twins made it nigh on impossible in the moment to determine which was actually up the other, but at that point our boy Matty wasn't fussed, his upbringing told him this was wrong on a number of levels.
The rumour also continues that Martin Pike, who had been with Primus immediately before, was still in the hallway and heard Primus' shriek of (let's call it) surprise. He called out to ask if everything was all right. Matty was speechless. In the words of Marsellus Wallce in the movie that came out a couple of years before, Pulp Fiction, "No man, I'm pretty farkin far from OK".

Is that why Simon Atkins was nicknamed "The Axe"?
Because he liked to chop things up?

Jon dorotich in the carlton fc carpark treating his body "like an amusement park"................

Wasn't dorotich doing that while a teammate was dominating, or piercin', a female newsreader?

Even though the above story is flat-out rape, it's still not the worst rumour I've heard about Michael Turner.

please do tell

 

What's the one about a particular news presenter and a coke bottle?

Keyte and J Diesel.
DON'T YOU KNOW IT'S CRYING SHAME
Think it's bullshit though....

 

 

I can confirm that it is, indeed, bullshit.