Tell me about your jury duty but be vewy, vewy careful

The systems so ridiculously broke anyway I don’t think there’s such a term as proper justice.

Street justice, on the other hand, I’d take unpaid leave for.

I guess our justice system isn’t perfect because people aren’t perfect. But I’ll take our justice system over “street justice” anytime.

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Vinnie, the only time I use the term seriously or the like is when I actually mean anything.

The rest is just total pigswill.

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Called 4 times. Had legitimate excuse once before they just deferred. Once I never got into a final 12. Once I sat in a rape case in county court. The last time I had deferred twice and when they chased me again I had an interstate meeting that I could demonstrate was impossible to delegate for, the day after the call up period. But they said I had no choice but to argue to a judge my case (if selected), it I’d be fined (or whatever). I got through the first day, didn’t get selected. I got most of the way through the second day and got selected. They asked for excuses. Some lady had been booked into an education training course for ages and there was no other time. BAD LUCK, he says. Someone else had a weaker excuse - BAD LUCK, NEXT. I gave my reasons and he extremely reluctantly let me off!

In the rape case, while we were deliberating one member needed a ciggie break. The tip staff told us he couldn’t split the herd so we’d all have to go out the front while buggalugs had a ciggie. BIG speech about if we speak or so much as acknowledge anyone out on the street and either prosecution or defence notices, the whole case might need to be re-tried. If your mother walks past, YOU IGNORE HER, RIGHT?!

So we’re out the front and a mate who’s a magistrate assumes I’m just walking past, so he claps me on the back and says gday. The whole jury looks At us startled startled. I look at him like I’ve seen a ghost and he scuttles off like a sprung schoolkid. Nothing bad resulted but it was funny.

Most I know have never been called. Some of us must be on a short list!

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