The Cricket Thread (part 6) - from July 2023 (Bartholemew Frinton-Smythe, Humphrey Wigbert-Porter, and Quinten Breckenridge)

What about Collingwood at Vic Park?

Or Hepburn at Hepburn?

True, not that much violence at cricket, but the racism is appalling. Not sure if it has improved over the last ten years, but last Test in England I saw in 2013 was not much better and the Poms trounced us on the field.

About as bad as Vic Park Members, but not as bad as Hepburn playing Daylesford. Toughest footy I have ever seen as well.

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So are you ok with mankad’s?

One of my mates umpired the infamous Hepburn vs Dunstown match.

Said it was on for young and old. They walked out to umpire the match, and reserves players were belting blokes in the crowd, the seniors came out and were belting reserves players, and the crowd was all in belting each other.

the umpires walked back into the change rooms and drove home.

Hepburn has cleaned themselves up. They’re a well ran club these days.

Last one I went to was Trent Bridge in 2018 and the crowd absolutely gave it to the Indians. Most of it was light hearted but still racist and then there was some downright disgusting stuff

is that you Mrs Bairstow? Stop feeding your son so many pies!
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Yep. Got no problem with a mankad. If you’re stupid enough to not move until the bowler releases the ball, you deserve what you get.

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How could anyone not be ok with Mankads? The batter is cheating, deliberately trying to gain advantage by stealing ground, and gets run out - in what universe is that anything but fair play?

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An official warning for protected area is actually a step in the application of rules. For no-balls I reckon a no-ball call is a pretty decent warning…

Can’t he read the rules?

This ashes series has provided me more dramatic enjoyment than Essendon has for an entire decade.

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For example:fast bowler straining to get a batsman out might bowl a no-ball because they don’t have great awareness of where the crease is and how to manage their run-up surely a bowling skill (i.e. an error of their own making). Let’s say umpire steps in and tells him he’s almost bowling a noey.

Next ball batter snicks out - but may well have been safe to a no-ball if the umpire hadn’t intervened.

I don’t like it. Just adjudicate - umpires are not coaches.

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Still want to know why the umpires sent it upstairs. What was the issue?

This is the thing. Carey was planning this, he’d seen what Bairstow does and actually threw it in anticipation. The ball by definition cannot be dead if the fielding side are trying to action something.

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Didn’t want to be responsible for making the clear obvious correct decision.

The reasonable defence for the umpire is he might have missed some indication from the bowling side that the ball was considered by them to be dead.

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The spirit of cricket is a fantastic thing. Lyon batting injured in the second innings, fans applauding an opposition player’s century, the Aussie respect for Stokes’s performance etc. But “Spirit of Cricket” is continually being used as a sort of Shelley’s Spakfilla to plaster the gaps between badly drafted rules. The Poms are very enthusiastic but breathtakingly untalented rule makers. They opt for the complex over the simple and make too many exceptions. Look at the Westminster system, the English language, rugby union, cricket, pretty much everything they put their minds to.

The rule in this case should be: The ball is in play until the umpire calls “Over”.

End of story.

“Oh but the batsman needs to be able to wander down the pitch between the second and third ball to prod down a tuft of grass with his bat”. …. No he doesn’t!!
“Oh but the batsman needs to go and tell his teammate that the ball is tailing in late”. …. No he doesn’t!!

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Still can’t believe McCullum has an issue with it when he ran out a bloke who was going down to celebrate a century with his batting partner.

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I didn’t like the stumping live and expressed as such on here, but then I saw the replays of Porkstow aimlessly, girthily plodding around after the preceding deliveries and most importantly, Carey collected and tossed the ball in one smooth action.

That made me apathetic.

The cavalcade of bleating and pearl clutching from the poms has made me all for it now tbh. All the examples of poms doing similar is hilarious.

Even putting aside the blatant hypocrisy with direct parallels from pom/baz history, fancy crying about ‘Spirit Of The Game’ when you have made a concerted effort to wheel out the flattest, deadest pom pitches ever which have necessitated an unprecedented barrage of short pitch bowling to extricate 20 wickets.

Spare me.

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