VFLW - Round 12 vs FCFC @ Windy Hill - 11am Sun 9 June 2024

The below assumes FCFC, or any other team, are not repeat arseholes.

- MODEL - - - PICKS - -
Rank Team Points Percentage Team Points Percentage
1 Willy 44 179% Hawks 40 201%
2 Hawks 40 201% Willy 40 177%
3 Bulldogs 40 121% Bulldogs 36 115%
4 EFC 30 88% EFC 34 92%
5 Magpies 28 93% Norf 32 94%
6 Norf 28 89% Port 24 106%
7 Port 24 103% Magpies 24 87%
8 FCFC 24 78% Darebin 24 72%
9 Casey 22 66% Casey 22 66%

Model says Norf lose to Hawks and Dogs; I have good Norf (if they turn up) will beat the Dogs.

Please be right, model (4 plays 5). Would be doubly good if Norf struck back and beat Footscray in week one of the finals, giving us a chance to proceed directly to the GF as the highest-placed winner of 3-6 (again!!!)

But not this one, any more.

Bloody hell, Peanut! :rofl:

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Fark Carlton got three relative cheapies late. Otherwise it was a very even game, despite them getting the headstart on us.


Yes, you are reading this right: Tia Davidge had NO marks!

Only three of our players had more than 1 clearance: sFord 6, Mahony 5, and Melnikas 3.

Tackles were 80 for each team: Mahony 13, Melnikas 11, Hunt 10 and Tassiopoulos 9 were our stand-outs.

  • Maddy Ford: great game! 9 marks and 22 disposals; confidence right up and arrogantly selling candy later in the game.
  • Molan spend much of the game as an extra down back, and had many rebounds.
  • Unlike the AFL team, plenty of our mids can forward proper, including Melnikas and (not today) Mahony.
  • Tassiopoulos is nominally a tall (but very light) forward, but in a game where delivery wasn’t on-a-platter she just goes out and hits the packs hard (those 9 tackles being indicative of that but not the full story).
  • Lily Bateman: respect!
  • Hart-Aluni has gone from a “balance” best 21 player (i.e. someone has to provide the pace, especially after the late departure of Dicker) to a legit good player. Little, but she is proper tough, and some of her movement through packs and evading/breaking tackles today was elite elite.

I did mention it in the call, but this was easily the worst-umpired game of the year. Literally dozens of head-scratchers, both ways.

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  • LOL at 9 FCers celebrating the early “goal”. This made Molan’s kick-out very easy!

  • I predict this commentator will be going on about MFord’s green boots all day – two intercept marks in the fourth minute of the game have already triggered that description.
  • This umpiring is… not good.
  • Takes over 9 minutes for us to reach our forward fifty.
  • 16:50 “green boots”, DRINK!
  • 18:40 Prpic hurts herself when landing, takes herself off.

Not much to point out, except pressure pressure pressure.


  • “Good shepherding” is whacking Manfre in the guts a little more than five metres away from the ball. But missing that would only be about the 8th-worst decision of the day so far.
  • 3:15 this commentator has never been to Windy Hill. Thinks the straight boundary NOT next to the bowls club is the tricky one.

She almost entirely missed the ball with the kick.

  • 5:30 No one has any idea what the free is, and everyone stops and looks at the ump. Except for Vescio, who just runs away with the ball. Did we get fifty? Hell no.
  • Hart-Aluni quietly stopping a mêlée starting is at 6:35
  • I try not to pick on pronunciation things, but “Charsturn” is annoying.
  • 9:25, “green boots”, DRINK!
  • 9:40 spindly arms are no reason not to be a great tackler (Tassiopoulos)
  • 10:40 that ump is in his own personal zone, and can’t see what is happening two metres in front of him. In this case, KrystalRussell bullying their ruck to the ground, so OK.
  • 11:25 oh (this game) invisible Tia, why did not take the advantage and kick the goal?
  • 12:20 we have as many goals as the AFLW team, and now we also have a point!
  • It’s part of a period of play when we are peppering our forward line at little actual score.
  • 14:45 Davidge hits up the leading Perkins, who never ever even thinks of not taking the set shot.
  • 17:20 classic example of the ump(s) being in the wrong place and having to guess (incorrectly, blatant drop). That gets it to 12m out, and Vescio goals.
  • Move your bloody camera, Seven!


  • Great quarter by sFord inside, especially given she is notably smaller than nearly everyone else out there.
  • 19:55 Chaston DESTROYS Di Donato, and lets her know all about it!


  • 2:20-2:30 Fark Carlton player picks up and then refuses to give us back the ball. Did we get a fifty and shot from zero metres out? Hell no. It was clear who the ball had to go back to by 2:21. Absolute bullshit.
  • 3:30 but at least their “50” was only 40m and really obvious high tackles by us at 5:10 are entirely invisible. Soooooo bad. FC also very slowly drop it at 5:15 and throw it at 5:45, nope.
  • 7:55 Tay blind turn and dancing through the pack is :100: … had another one similar in the first quarter but failed to get the kick off well in that case.
  • 10:30 Tay again beating three FCers. Unfortunately, one of the umps thinks a hair tackle is HTB if there was prior opportunity. The nearest ump looked set to pay high, but got over-ruled.
  • Russell is just too strong to safely compete against AFLW-listed rucks.
  • 14:50 I guess I can’t complain about the Manfre miss when FCFC are on 1.10 right now… and Davidge was actually a metre away from being able to provide the needed shepherd.
  • The Two Hairy Dudes are behind the school goals.
  • Marnie got burnt off twice in the opening minutes of the game, but has recovered after that to save us many times.
  • 18:15 Melnikas all but picked up off the ground without the ball. Her astonishment as she looks in varying directions to find the ball – because the one thing she knows is that she doesn’t have it – is comical. Tackle frees (and non-frees) were completely randomly-generated in this game (with no particular bias as to which team got screwed each time).


  • 0:35 “green boots”, DRINK!
  • Perkins has huge gecko hands.
  • 0:50 Jesus H ■■■■■■■ Christ, what is wrong with you, umpire? The crowd noise is pretty low in this video, but that was the definition of BALL (unless you called it high).
  • Always good when the word “umbrage” can be used in commentary.
  • 1:20 Mind you, Melnikas then gets the free closer to goal for… um, no one knows. I speculated at the time that Ash kicking in danger was read as a trip.
  • 2:40 LOL at Melnikas steadfast “stand” despite the fake-out by Vescio.
  • Boooooooooo… turns out the Carlton AFLW team can kick multiple goals in a game.
  • 4:45 Good is soooooo soft in the ruck, and then soooooo sad when she doesn’t get a free for it.
  • 5:10 she’s also a bad tap ruck: watch the late-arriving Russell not compete… and Good perfectly taps it to her!
  • 5:23-5:34 FCFC cheat so much. Clear instructions not to return the ball. Tia tries to grab the ball at 5:32 and Pound pulls it away from her. This game could have been quite a bit more interesting if these two overtly obvious fifties were paid.
  • Anyone who had Bateman being trusted with the job of Vescio on their bingo card at the start of the year is a liar.
  • In this second half, Gab Pound was a freakin’ cheat code for them
  • Watch Melnikas from 14:05: leaves her opponent to kill a lead, dives into danger to (attempt to) hit the ball clear, dives into danger again and earns kicking-in-danger.
  • It’s only 4.5 minutes from the end of the game when FCFC finally seal the win. Yes, their inaccuracy suggests this could have been a pumping like the GWS game, but we were right in this (not just score-wise) for the vast bulk of the game.
  • 17:40 let’s finish this game as it started: with a bullshit tackle call. Clearest handball ever is pinged as a throw.
  • 18:20 we have 100 seconds left, and Tay and Ruby are running blind to mark the high ball. One player every 120 degrees, and they almost achieved nuclear fusion. Credit also to their Lulu Beatty.



Player Q1 Q2 Q3 Q4 Total
Morrow 1 2 1 3 7
Hunt 2 1 3 6
Melnikas 1 1 1 3 6
Mahony 1 2 1 1 5
Chaston 1 1 2 4
Ford 3 3
Russell 1 1

Tidier ladder.

Note that next week is entirely top six versus top six: Footscray vs Casey, Norf vs Hawks, and us vs Willy.

Port get to beat Geelong.

Pies may fall to Darebin. C’mon Mon!

No reports from this game.

Only VFLW report was Amanda Ling of Norf for a dangerous tackle. She has accepted the 1 week early plea.

It took a while for them to arrive, but up now are 61 Gallivant photos.


I’m going to venture this was not a free.

And the other ruck, Krystal Russell, back after a long time away.

These photos look better at full resolution: rain drops and grass flying everywhere.