You’ll miss her terribly because she’s your mum who’s such a special person in your life, but to know she’ll pass peacefully and will not suffer unnecessarily I hope eases the pain. I watched my dad suffer for days & in the end we truly wished it could just be over for him & my mum passed peacefully with the help of morphine. I miss them both - dad was only 57 & I do feel really robbed of time with him.
It will be really hard to lose her - my heart goes out to you, but take some solace in knowing that she hasn’t suffered.
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My only piece of advice, that I feel very unqualified to give, is that how you feel afterwards will be what it will be, and you will be entitled to deal with this pretty much however it happens at the time.
But worry about that when it comes. You have these next days to focus on and cherish first.
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I’ve always had this view that we were given our lives by someone else and so while we grow up, become independent and own what we become, we also belong to the people around us.
When someone loses their life or takes it or whatever, they also take a bit of the lives of those around them as well - just like we keep a bit of them with us after they’ve gone.
Sorry for what you’re dealing with.
All the best LB.
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Good luck LB. Got a tough time in front of you. I wish you all the best. (As best as it can be).
Actually thought this was the St Kilda thread. My bad.
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My folks have always said they don’t wont to end up in a poor state in a nursing home and that the other one is to let them go instead of keeping them at any cost.
But a couple of years ago I was glad that I was sitting beside my mother in the hospital after my Dad had been admitted with some pretty serious seizures. A doctor came in to discuss the DNR policy and mum straight away said that they weren’t to resuscitate. I said "Woah there Mum. It’s just seizures at this stage.
Let’s wait for the test results ".
He did need resuscitation at one stage, but within a couple of weeks he was home and 2 years later he’s still wandering around full of cheek.
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Put ‘em down?
I thought I would update the situation. My mother ended her life this morning. She was allowed four people to attend due to Covid and being in an Oncology ward. The moment she swallowed the liquid almost broke me, because I knew right there and then that there was no coming back. All I can say is that it was peaceful and her pain ended in a way she wanted. I can’t thank the staff enough for their care and compassion. I am heartbroken because my mum is gone, but the method of her going reinforces to me the value of assisted dying. Having seen my father after his death and the obvious pain on his face from a massive heart attack and comparing that to my mother’s passing, punctuated by the occasional soft snore, and there is no doubt in my mind which ending I prefer.
Thank you all for your compassion.
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All our love Bro.
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All our thoughts are with you.
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Thinking of you mate
And how brave your mum was through this whole thing too. Her terms.
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Beautiful post.
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It was courageous.
I admire her.
I honestly don’t think I could do what she did. I feel like I’d fight for every last breath, even knowing how stupid and pointless it was.
What a brave woman.
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I thought that until my brother, and my uncle before him, died. They just got to a point where there was zero prospect of recovery to even a modest chance of survival, and they resigned themselves to it. This was 20-25 years ago, so no assisted dying, but they were not unhappy to go.
In my brother’s case, at least it was after the 2000 flag win, not that he could enjoy it at all. I don’t think he enjoyed anything in the 14 weeks after diagnosis. He probably thought he was going to miss a period of great triumph for the club. Little did he know.
He was born in a year we won a flag with only one loss, and died in a year with a flag and one loss. Actually born on the day we unfurled the 1949 flag.
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Just gonna say what we’re all thinking.
Gotta hurt like FARK to lose your mum.
bro hugs
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My condolences @Lifetime_ban.
Losing a loved one is the pits. Virtual hugs to you.
Vale @Lifetime_ban’s mum.
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Thank you.
You are right it is the pits.
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You’re unlikely to encounter a tougher day than today. If you do then you’re up for it and if you don’t, then thank fark for that. I reckon your mum would have been proud of you and so are we.
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My thoughts and condolences @Lifetime_ban . What a heart wrenching time for you & your family. Your post is beautifully written- thank you for allowing us in to this most difficult day of your life. I am so glad that it all went as your mum would have wanted.
Take care and cherish all the special memories of a wonderful mother.
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