DARWIN AWARDS - name your candidate


#81

He’s Swiss. He would have jumped if you onion spillers offered him a sausage on stale bread.


#82

Humans at the top of the evolutionary ladder?


#83

Amen brother.

P.S. Sorry about your uncle. My uncle was recently diagnosed with bowel cancer. He had an operation and things didn’t go too well so had to have another. Now it looks like he will pull through. Very lucky. Another uncle didn’t make it (Mesothelioma) about 8 years ago. It still feels like yesterday.


#84

He was obviously a high flyer.


#85

#86

Darwinian indeed, Doe - but it doesn’t say the octopus killed him, nor even stung him.


#87

Don’t know about Darwinian if he didn’t know exactly what it was.
They’re quite pretty.


#88

If it happened in Darwin, would he get extra points?


#89

A couple of those would make a nice entree.


#90

A pretty good rule for international tourists visiting Australia is if it walks, runs, hops, crawls, slithers, scuttles, swims, flies, glides, stands still, doesn’t move, or if it has stripes, spots, rings, wings, feathers, scales, spikes, a shell, ears, eyes, teeth, a mouth, claws, paws, hands, flippers, tentacles, legs, hair or skin; don’t farken touch it.


#91

True.
Story time:
When I was in Port Douglas a few months ago we met a couple of…Swedish, doesn’t matter but I think Swedish…blokes at a scenic lookout.
One of them saw a fluffy caterpillar crawling on the informationy thing, pokes his mate.
‘Ehhh?’
nods ‘Ehhh.’
First guy goes to pick it up, second guy stops him.
‘Do you know what that is?’
‘No…’
‘Right, so don’t ■■■■■■■ touch it then. You’re in Australia.’

Smart guy, that Swede #2.


#92

Killer caterpillars in FNQ?

That joint is munted.


#93

Well, they don’t, but…you realise you guys have cone fish, right?


#94

Conefish sound like good fun.


#95

With the average male having a reproductive lifetime of around 60 years and the average female having a reproductive lifetime of around 30 years, and given the standard Fichers rule male to female birth ratio of 50/50, males have twice the duration of opportunity to mate. Therefore the success of the human species is 2/3 due to males and 1/3 due to females and probably is the reason why males are more aggressive than females. If females reproductive life was longer than that of males there would be more cat fights and women would generally ask men to marry them, if indeed marriage even existed under such circumstances.

My Nomination: Margaret Thatcher, the most powerful woman with the wimpiest mate in living memory.


#96

How am I going to pick up with a rule like that


#97

That is hectic.


#98

#99

Deserves a good kick in the ice hole, that bloke.


#100

Decided to go with the floe.