Warning! The following review/story is not for the faint hearted!
Electric Wizard, Dopethrone
Years and years ago at the Meredith Music Festival I was presented with the option of trying LSD for the first time. A few of us all agreed we’d do it, so being keen I dropped the sugar cube while the friends looked on, only for them to stare at me and chicken out at the last minute. A lesser man would be taken aback but not me. “That’s cool” I thought, and plugged in for the ride.
It started well as these things do, but before long it was coming very hard and I left my friends at the stage for the safety of our camp, the bright lights, colourful people and thumping music too much for me.
On arriving at the camp, things soon took a turn for the weird with complete visual distortion and patterns emerging.
It was then I realised I needed to go to the toilet.
I stood and proceeded to the nearest portable, but within 50m was smacked in the face by a psychadelic amplified stench the like of which I’ve never experienced. There was no way I could get closer, so I returned to camp and spent some time studying the chip packet under our camp table, which looked remarkably like a giant cod.
The need to expel soon disappeared but shortly after that the worry started. “Have I shat myself?” I started wondering. I couldn’t remember ■■■■■■■■ myself but the need to go had gone and I started to worry.
It was dark, very dark. I look around. No-one. I stand, and put my hand down my pants. I pull it out, and despite rainbows following my hand, it seemed clean. But was it really?
The next few hours were spent in worry, with periodic checks, thinking that last time I’d checked I might have made a mistake.
Eventually I went to the tent and fell asleep, dreams of naked dancers spewing excrement from their bellies filling my mind.
I woke to a full campsite and all the lads cleaning up. They feel a big bad for leaving me, and while I’m not worried about it I take the opportunity to let them pack up while I sit in a chair enjoying the final remnants of last nights ingestion. I’m now feeling a little straighter and not prepared to put the hands down the pants now. I can’t smell anything, no-one has commented or gave me weird looks. I’ll play it subtle and see what happens.
On the way back we stop at a shopping centre for a feed. I go to the toilet, pull down my pants, and the relief as I found my boxers sparkling clean was heard throughout the centre. I have never been so happy.
So what has this to do with Elextric Wizards magnum opus “Dopethrone”?
If any band will discover the brown note, it’s these guys. They play heavy and they play LOW. So low that I could never see myself doing LSD and listening to them, for fear that the morning after underpants inspection will not be as successful as that fateful Saturday/Sunday at Meredith all those years ago.
It’s a cracking albumn though. Fat riffs, fat bass. If you haven’t already (and it’s getting on in years now) have a listen.