Ranking our rivarlies

I had a crack at ranking our opponents from from biggest rival to most insignificant weed, wondering if you all agree:

  1. Carlton

Obvious one. 16 premierships a piece. Played our first game against them. In more recent years: 1993, 1999, Bryce Gibbs Cup

  1. Collingwood

Had to put them at 2. Long long history. Can’t forget 1990. Anzac Day the biggest non-final of the year. Long and Monkhorst.

  1. Hawthorn

Not relevant until the 80s, but what a rivalry. 83-86, line in the sand game and many epic fights.

  1. Richmond

1974 fight at Windy Hill. Dreamtime at the G

  1. West Coast

Wave that scarf. Woosha.

  1. North Melbourne

They consider us their biggest rival. Some great fights in the 80s. Greatest comeback of all time.

  1. Melbourne

7 times played for a flag. The Anzac Day comeback. They hate us after 2000

  1. Fitzroy/Brisbane

Great rival in the early years. Ruined Tim Watson’s 300th. 2001.

  1. Port

Paddy Ryder. Gavin Wanganeen.

  1. Geelong
  2. Footscray
  3. St Kilda
  4. Sydney

Hard to think of a history between us and this lot that is significant in my lifetime. Scrays beat us in 1925 to get into the VFL. We beat St Kilda for a flag in 1965. Geelong beat us for the flag in 1951. But nothing bitter, just many more years than…

  1. Adelaide
  2. Fremantle
  3. GWS
  4. Gold Coast

Well GWS did have Sheeds…

  1. Hawthorn
  2. Carlton
  3. Collingwood

Stupid point but I hate GC more than GWS for their stupid approach to trading with Caddy etc. (thank fk).

Port and dogs have cemented themselves firmly in my top hated handful.

I didn’t enjoy being beaten by the swans by 1 point in the 96 prelim after the siren…

And the rest …

Hawthorn And the rest ...

No collingwood and Carlton are definitely rivals.

Fark carlton

1976 or77 blood bath at moorabin?fark st.kilda.

Those pesky rivarlies


North Melbourne is the most one sided rivalry there is. They hate us with a passion. We tend to forget they exist.

North Melbourne is the most one sided rivalry there is. They hate us with a passion. We tend to forget they exist.

Whenever people talk about North’s rivalry with us, I’m reminded of

  1. Fark Carlton. Scum. Goes back to Colemans suspension.
  2. Hawks displacing the filth.
  3. The filth.
  4. roos.
  5. Port.

Anyone who mentions North as a rival must support… I can’t even think of a club that would be a north rival, some other nothing club, maybe the bulldogs? St Kilda?



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North Melbourne
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St Kilda

Collingwood is always top for me. Even when they’ve been crap, I’ve enjoy beating them because their supporters get all cocky if they even get a bit of a sniff.

Carlton used to be higher on the list, but they are nearing insignificance the way they’re going and their fans barely turn up to the games.

Right now we can afford to pity Carlton. But at times they have been our nemesis. So long term they are no 1. Sydney actually for me come in above most of the rest except Collingwood, Hawthorn and Brisbane

Ah, Yossarian you must be a young one. Those of us who remember Terry Cahill (never played again) and other young bombers being brutalised by Ditterich and Sidebottom at Moorabbin in the 70’s will have St Kilda near the top of this list. The grandstands rocked with pleasure that day as we witnessed the thuggery. At the bottom of the ladder is St Kilda’s rightful place.

Fark Carlton

Dogs (growing up in the western suburbs - their supporters are insufferably arrogant over repeated failure)
Fark North
…dislike the rest equally