Dunno. Maybe. ■■■■ still happens, one of our neighbours was an Italian “businessman” who got gunned down, allegedly by a Gangitano “associate”
And there was a dead asian dude who one of my folks’ neighbours found in a ditch the other year. Still unidentified.
And one of the guys who got pinned for that shooting in Oakleigh about a month ago.
Alan Ezard lived around the corner from me when I was a kid. I went over there and asked him if he wanted to play kick to kick and we spent about 45 minutes playing kick to kick in the court he lived in.
Got #15 on my back and he signed it for me. Really had a great day.
He must have regretted it because he moved 3 weeks later.
Back in the day Peter Moore ran training at our local club. We were doing some warm up circle work and he asked for all the footies to be kicked into the middle where he was standing. I banged mine onto my trusty left foot from 50 m away and immediately had a bad feeling. It bounced once and hit him on the back of the head…hard. Knocked him over. He jumped up and asked who kicked it… gave me an almighty spray. Terrible.
He played poorly the next Saturday.
I became a legend.
True story.
I went to school with him. He had a brown duffle coat with Ken 1 Judge on the back.
He’s an unlikeable dirty cheat in park cricket too.
Is he playing for Heatherdale again?
He was a pretty handy player before becoming a maggot, played some firsts for Ringwood in district/premier.
Popped up for St David’s.
Playing with his son I think.
I once got naked with Graham Studley Cornes in the outdoor Onsen at the Mominoki Hotel in Hakuba Japan. He was very nice.
The guy to the left is a reasonable representation.
Skeletor is his fallback nickname over here…
Ok, I know what you’re thinking. And you’ve been thinking it since I started this thread. “Disparaging anecdotes? Man, I can’t wait until round two when we play St Kilda, there’s bound to be some humdingers!” But I don’t want to share stories everyone already knows. And that’s the issue with St Kilda, everyone already knows the outrageous stuff their players get up to, usually immediately after it happens. Sometimes during. However there’s one that slips under the radar because he plays it safe. No risks, no danger. And that man is Callum Wilkie. The straight-and-narrowest person on this god damn planet.
Callum uses 3-ply toilet paper and double folds it. He bought a pack of sparklers for NYE, but once he got started watching some fire safety videos on Youtube before lighting one he couldn’t resist watching more and more and more for about three hours then went to bed at 11:10pm. He initially bought all of his teammates a box of Celebrations chocolates each for Christmas (on sale at Big W) but felt guilty for assuming everyone “celebrates” it and exchanged them all for boxes of Roses.
He always votes below the line in the Senate. “Don’t want anyone to feel left out!”
He has already booked an Uber to the airport for the Round 16 away game.
One time I saw him using Tinder. His profile photo is him in a white shirt in a bar smiling with friends (Jarryn Geary is cropped out). Heard his reasons as he continually swiped left. “No, she’s showing too much skin. No, she’s too thin. No, she’s four months younger than my lower age limit. No, she probably just wants to keep on travelling not settle down with a local. No, she’s too beautiful. No, she’s too happy. No, she’s not too happy enough.” He eventually swipes right on Jess, 24. The photo is just four blonde women, all in white tops, all with brown eyes. Any of them will be fine.
Tell you what though, he does let loose sometimes. The night before a game, Grill’d for dinner. Gets on Netflix, finds whatever motion picture grossed the highest and was released in the last two years laboriously cross-referenced with what he thinks his peers have seen and enjoyed, to ensure a guaranteed conversation starter sometime in the future. Sometimes it’s good to just kick back and relax.
Sounds like the exact type of player we recruit. Bring Him In.
I look forward to this game each and every year.
Big lol at “commercial acumen”
Way back in the mid to late 80’s, I was at The Espie in St Kilda (from memory) with a group of friends. There was a large room full of drinkers with a small stage where people would get up to sing karaoke.
Up on stage came a very drunk Danny Frawley, propped up on either side by a couple of other footballers whose names I’ve either forgotten or never knew.
The inevitable Khe Sahn came on blaring. Spud stares at the screen for the words. Fails to make sense of the words, or maybe fails to even see the screen. Yells “Suck me off!” at the top of his lungs, and staggers off the stage, to polite applause. Classy night out.
I’ve been in the animal enclosure at Moorabbin and in the members’ stand too. Makes the Vic Park outer seem like an after-dinner port at the Melbourne Club.
Really, really doubt you were at the Espie mate.
Bloke l worked with was at a domestic airport lounge/bar when he spotted Warnie at a table. Went up and asked if he could sign a beer coaster for his son. Warnie took the coaster and started writing then handed it back. My work mate walked off and thought he’d scored a nice sig for his son until he looked at the coaster and instead of warnie’s sig it just said “f@$k off”.
