The Best Xmas Cracker Joke for 2017

Would you tell that joke to an African? You wouldn’t, and the reason is because it’s racist.

Why did the Scientist install a door knocker at his home?

He wanted to win a no bell prize.


I dare you to walk into the Flemington housing flats and call all the Sudanese kids there “negro”. Then explain to them why it’s not racist, because in the original spanish…


I did hear a terrible one:

Have you ever smelt mothballs?

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In spanish, negro isn’t pronounced “knee grow”

Rodilla crecer?

Does that also apply to Occidentals, Asians, Hispanics, Caucasians or the Aryan Race.

Anthropology by Presidential Decree, there was a bloke running around Europe in the 30’s that used to do that.

Freaks sake who cares

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Went straight over my head until I read the extended commentary below.

Isn’t ‘cracker’ a derogatory term for white folk? Seems no word is safe at this time of year

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Only in USA where it refers to poor white farmers who raised corn and wheat and couldn’t afford to own slaves.

In UK, it is something good.

In Australia, my Dad would refer to certain young ladies, who “went off like a cracker”. I was much older before I worked out what he meant.

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Off topic but here goes.
Shouldn’t African/American actually be African/Caucasian?
Or, technically, African?Caucasoid. (Caucasian being somebody from the Caucasus region?

And lastly, if you can call me Caucasian I can call Black Africans, negro.

Anyway, what does Santa suffer from when he gets caught in a chimney?

Sure you can. I bet you never try it though.

It doesn’t work like that. There are 3 sub specie types, Caucasoid, Mongoloid, and Negroid,

In the singular, Caucasian, Mongol, and Negro,

So it doesn’t have to do with countries.

To be Caucasian/Negro, that would be bi racial, or technically, bi Sub specie, whereas, African - American is like Dutch - Australian, … Dutch heritage, born/live in Oz.

You need an updated Phrenology textbook.


Q:Why does Noddy have a bell on his hat?

A:Because he’s a ■■■■.


Talk about building suspense, the punch line is filtered out.

Still don’t get it

I lmao, I’m wondering if it works as well when you dont have to “unlock” it like that.

I’ll find out tomorrow.

Wasn’t actually an Xmas joke. It’s from a movie - ‘cemetery junction’ iirc. I guess a lot of it is in the delivery.

Why don’t dinosaurs talk?

Because they’re all dead.

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