The mental health thread


So, I don’t really know what im expecting from this, so feel free to comment on anything in anyway you like…I’m 41, have no idea how I’m supposed to know if I have a mental health issue as I’ve always felt way too many people think they do, when in reality it’s just a down time in life.

My whole life I have kinda felt out of place as a human, I have a very logical mind which sometimes makes the world in general and humans not make sense, and in my opinion have always been quite the introvert. Over the last 15 years or so my ability to interact with people has definitely improved, but within myself it still feels extremely awkward and totally draining to spend time with people / interact with people I am not comfortable with.

I’ve always struggled to sleep, which has finally started to catch up with me as I get older…not sure of the exact reason, overactive brain, little joint pains and aches and niggles seem to be the main factors. I have tried some meditate to sleep apps and had varying degrees of success but nothing that had a huge impact. Diet and exercise isn’t the best at the moment but even when I have looked after myself better sleep has never been consistently good.

I have a decent paying job, which sometimes I enjoy sometimes I don’t, am buying a house etc so from that side I guess my life is ok in general.

Around 12 months ago I seperated from my partner of 10 years, the last 5 years had been hard as she was diagnosed with leukaemia, had to temporarily move to Melbourne, have a bone marrow transplant and go through recovery - we got through that together, but aftermath of her not being able to have kids etc made her decide she needed to figure out what else she wanted from life as all she had ever wanted was to settle down and have kids.

So apparently through no fault of my own, we had to settle finances etc, which even though we were amicable still sets you back a long way financially.

I do have friends so to speak but they have their own lives and we don’t catch up that often, problem is, I don’t really enjoy catching up that much anyway, and my friends are kinda limited in common interest - as in, one friend I play golf with, but has a family and has no time to spare and we don’t really share any other interests apart from golf. Another friend may share an enjoyment of video games, but nothing else so spending time with these friends tends to get “boring” quite quickly.

I met a new partner about 7 months ago who lived about an hour away but things with her was absolutely fantastic, unfortunately that looks like it’s about to end due to her trying to become a pilot (means further distance and less time together) and having health issues of her own, which in her mind mean she can’t give me what I apparently “need”.

So again, even though things are awesome, it could be over…which leaves me with little human contact again, which doesn’t really bother me but I know it isn’t healthy…

I don’t personally think I need help so to speak and I am dead set against taking anything so not really wanting to go see a dr who just sticks me on pills…just don’t want to spiral somewhere that I’d rather not be…thoughts? Suggestions? Probably missed a heap of stuff in my head so ask questions of there are gaps etc.


I had a terrible experience with Effexor.
I became terribly reliant on it.
I’m not saying it didn’t ‘work’ as such, but being on it created other problems.
I went cold turkey which I do Not recommend, but I felt like I had to kick it.
Experienced extreme paranoia, anxiety, shakes, and…someone else had a better word for this earlier, but to me it was like someone was unsheathing a very sharp sword inside my head at random moments of day or night.

So…if you get that, it’s normal.
And it passes.


Withdrawals were very very nasty for Mrs P.

I would suggest make sure you have all your other ducks in a row, before getting off it. Easier said than done.



You could try just talking to a psychologist. As others have said, you might have to try a few before you find the one that’s right for you. Nothing to lose and it’s definitely preferable than going straight for drugs when you’re not even sure what your issues are. I can understand if you have a reluctance to talk (I’m similar), but doing so might really help to clarify some things for you.


Hey man. I was on Effexor for a long time. It was very difficult to come off. I don’t have the time to chat now but will get back to you.


I overheat walking from the car to the station. I clench my teeth like nothing else. And then there are all the other issues a single person doesn’t want or need!


Thank you!


Yeah, well…I think that was kinda me anyway.

It gets better.
If you’re ready then you’re ready.


A good reminder that getting positive messages on social media, aka “social justice warriors” actually do some good.


Hrmm, I can talk to anyone about it, problem is, Ive already analysed it all logically in my head and talked it through internally so not sure talking to anyone would help…guess I am just trying to make sure I’m not on some slippery slope downwards without realising it.

I think I’m pretty self aware so I’ll know if I ever get past a certain point, but I’m sure others have thought that about themselves and then ended up in bad situations.


I’d suggest that if you have even an inkling then it might be time to talk to someone.
We adapt to the new normal.
We’re functioning? Okay, good. No problem, then.
When you come out of it, you can’t quite believe how long you thought living like that was okay.

I’m not gonna tell you what to do, other than to be kind to yourself.


Just an example


I recently came off Pristiq which is a cousin of effexor. I’ll pm when i get a chance.


I’m not sure what Morris dancing is.




Whay Hey! They look like they’re having a great time.


I’m not sure having a conversation with yourself about your mental health is the best sounding board.

I get really annoyed with all this gaff telling us to ‘talk to someone’ ‘ask for help’ … often there is literally no one to talk to… more often there is simply no help available.

None of those things apply to you. We’re here… always… and obviously… we ain’t going anywhere.


This is what everyone with anxiety does.

It doesn’t help.

It can however make things quite a lot worse.


Thanks for the replies Darli and HAP, and that’s why I blurted it all out here… But it still leaves me at square one, I’ve already given myself the advice anyone else can give me… So where to next…does simply discussing it here = talking to someone? Do I need to make more of an effort to meet new people… Or considering I’m ok with being a hermit should I just be a hermit and stop worrying that it’s unhealthy…I’m very self aware and can usually snap myself out of down times pretty quickly, but is that just masking the underlying issues…