Sending you hugs.
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You look after yourself Zimmer. Plenty here to chat to if you need. Hope you are doing ok.
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Thanks guys. It is a dangerous intersection all around. I didnât mean to suggest âidealâ in any other way than a person in that state of mind - of which Iâve had some experience, personal, paternal and familial.
An awful thing in a generally â â â â â â week, month.
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I went in for a sleep clinic last night and had a foolow up with the specialist earlier to get the results.
Apparently I stop breathing approximately every 1 1/2 minutes for 20-40 seconds at a time. Did that for nearly 7 hours overnight. Dr said if I tried to do that while I was awake I would fall over pretty quick. My oxygen percentage was down to 86% where the average person should be between 96-98% on a consistent basis. Going back next week to get fitted for a CPAP machine.
This goes along way to explaining my continued feeling of fatigue and my struggle to lose weight but most importantly, my moods.
I have really struggled to control my anger lately and have also been feeling consistently depressed/sad although nothing has been diagnosed. 3 days ago I was mowing the lawns and just broke down crying for about 10 minutes. Completely out of the blue.
Hopefully this will give my body and mind a chance to rehabilitate and get back to where I used to be.
Might not work for everyone (or anyone else) but if there are issues youâre experiencing, maybe this might help.
A shame I didnât do something sooner as my wonderful wife has been encouraging me for a couple of years to do this as she said I stopped breathing every night.
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Sleeping well is key, so understandable that you feel the way you do.
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Absolutely
i have sleep problems as well and feel tired or fatigued easy but i canât wear CPAP it feels too claustrophobic. tried one for 3 months trial but it ended up the other side of the room each night but never woke me when i took it of or no memory. shift work and high iron havenât helped.
hope you succeed and keep the forum informed well hopefully seeing what succeeds helps others made a decision on what track to take . cheers
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do you sleep on your back?
not that it compares in anyway to what youâve said, i used to get the feeling or sensation that something was up when sleeping on my back when i was younger, constantly feeling like my chest was getting crushed, and when i did nod off would just wake up randomly feeling shocked.
since about 15 ish or even younger iâve always slept on my front side and never really had it again bar the bad anxiety filled attempts at sleeping.
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Ibused to always sleep on my left side until I hurt my shoulder at work a few tears ago. I canât lay on it for extended periods now.
I swap from side to side with the occassional period if time in my back. Cannot sleep on my front.
I usually bomb quickly and then wake around 1am. From then until I get up, usually around 5am, I doze on and off.
Not Okay, â â â â â â off, even when they try to help, they find a way to make me feel â â â â â â â and even less important.
The fact Iâm this upset about something that really doesnât matter and was an honest mistake provides an interesting insight into my current state.
Not particularlyâŚprobably worse than I thought it was given my reaction to tonightâs non-event.
So Iâve been struggling for awhile, depression & anxiety, so in attempt to do something for myself Iâve been going to the gym after work a couple of nights a week.
On Tuesdays my 11-year-old daughter has taken it upon herself to make dinner because she likes cooking.
Anyway she made chicken wraps tonightâŚbut given her younger siblings are fussy she was just making them chicken all good. Then the 6-year-old freaks out particularly because she is over tired and partly because she decides she needs a chicken wrap. So I give her a chicken wrap. Then 11-year-old freaks out a bout not having enough wraps. So I say to her that if she doesnât have enough wraps Iâll just have mine in a sandwich. It appears she heard âIâll just have a sandwichâ
Honest mistakeâŚI donât think anything about it. Take the overtired 6-year-old to bed while she finishes making dinner for everyone else. Get the 6-year-old to sleep and come out to have some dinner. Of which of course there is none left.
Which means I need to make my own dinner. Which would be fine if this was me pre having 5 kids, all of him have been extremely fussy, 2 of which are ASD and have all sorts of sensory issues with food, thus making food preparation a living heâll. Iâve gone from enjoying cooking to absolutely despising it. So having to make my own dinner on a night when I wasnât meant to need to has really ridiculously upset me.
10:30 and I havenât even started making myself anything despite being significantly hungry.
Having typed that out, it makes me realise even more how ridiculously over the top, this has upset me.
Two ASD kids, a 3-year-old, a 1-year-old and a wife with her own more chronic mental health problems and Iâm always out of spoons. Any little symbol of appreciation or that they actually give a â â â â about me are important. I know they actually do, but the displays of this can be few and far between.
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Damn, that was a long time of âE replyingâŚâ flicking on and off⌠I hope writing that was therapeutic!
Also Fatherâs Day on the weekend and no matter how hard they try they will inevitably find a way to â â â â all over it.
Then a couple of weeks later they will do it again on my birthday. I already know my birthday will definitely suck because we are road tripping to Canberra, so my wife can present at a conference on my actual birthday.
Bugger mate. Not much I could say right now to make you feel better in the short term. Question though, are you talking to any professionals about how youâre travelling?
Iâve been there with the depression and anxiety, albeit for different reasons. If you need an ear then I or, Iâm sure any number of others here would be happy to listen. .
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Sounds a tough row to hoe ealsey., but hey mate, give yourself a pat on the back for doing your best eh? Sounds like you definitely are.
Someone is always here to listen btw.
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I was flicking through some old posts and came across yours, ever remember the ear bashing from her I got about why would I go to the royal?(we were at the cricketers) Makes sense now, in hindsight
I hope your recovering, and I hope your doing better now than when you posted that, because your a good bloke
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I do remember mate, and thanks, and likewise. 
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Sympathy for you, mate. Iâve done the carer thing before, when youâve got your own issues but youâre continually shoving them to the back of the queue so you deal with everyone elseâs louder and more immediate problems. Itâs a really rough gig, and itâs often the tiny little things that push you over the cliff and then you feel rotten about it later.
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