At the movies

Hands down, ‘Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot!’

Edit: To be fair, she was doing video reviews for the local paper. It’s not like she really wanted to see it either.
Her headline, ‘Stop! Or I Will Shoot Myself!’ did not go down well with the local video shop, as they’d bought about a million copies.

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The only movie I’ve ever walked out on was The Passion.
Utter garbage, self-indulgent and gratuitous,

As in of the Christ ?

The New World with Colin Farrell.

I fell asleep 20 mins in before dragging the missus out.

Worst. Movie. Ever

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There was one I started watching in Paris once…with Matthew Modine and Claudia Schiffer…I walked out before CS appeared. Self-indulgent twaddle.

Diary of a Mad Housewife back in the 70s

And the one and only Bollywood movie I’ve ever gone to…it was supposed to be a political thriller set in Istanbul…3 song-and-dance routines in the first half-hour were enough for me.

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I fell asleep 10 minutes into Final Fantasy.
Woke up about 2 and a half hours later for the ending. Best short snooze ever.

And I’m not racist, apart from that one time I lynched that black guy

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Sometimes we have to be judged on our one-offs.
You can’t, for example, assassinate a President and then say that wasn’t really like me at all.
But I think in this case it’s more about the movie than some sort of latent sci-fi hatred.

Oh I agree. I mean my black guy really really had it coming, I feel ya

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I walked out on Lock, Stock & Two Smoking Barrels*

*Only cos someone set off the fire alarms.

Smoko in the theatre… those were good times.

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l have only ever walked out on 2 movies, both from the 1970’s.

  1. Flesh Gordon. An early exaple of commercial ■■■■, a group of us went to see it one Sunday night, and l think it was a couple of the ladies in the group who chose it. In one scene an alien resembling an erect ■■■■■ arises out of the floor/ground. Too silly for words, l wasn’t the only on who walked out.
  2. Diary of A Lover (IIRC) from the 1978 Melbourne film festival. Made in somewhere like Iran. One setting, a man’s bedroom, and all done in one act with just a single camera and one character who does his own voice over, talking about a lost love, and the existential cost. Turns out he had murdered her and had hidden the corpse under the bed. Shizen with a capital Sh!

Yep, that one.

Just watched Mother. I’ve seen a lot of shiite movies in my time but this takes the cake. Was like it was dreamt up by a 17 year old stoner film student. Jennifer Lawrence’s boobs didn’t even save it. Uugh

I liked it.

Mother was one of the most annoying dumb movies I’ve seen

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I saw Flesh Gordon, but I stuck it out till the bitter end. In fact I stayed for the second feature, which was something called The Boob Tube, which was supposed to be some sort of satire on the inanity of television. It was said to contain naked breasts and I think it actually did, but very briefly and indistinctly. I was terribly disappointed.

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Have you seen reefer madness

Nope.

There’s your third walk out

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