High Fyfe Draft Review 2017
Coach Come Back Hirdy picked up a woeful bunch of spuds, most of whom will be delisted by mid-season. The rest will be held onto forlornly in the hope that they come good, only to miss the keeper cut at the expense of some other spuds and then end up at redbull’s team and become superstars. This year already looks like a write-off, with regular scores below 1000 looking likely.
As such, the coach has fulfilled his duty according to the club’s constitution.
Pick 6. Tim English (R, Western Bulldogs)
The two rules of fantasy footy drafts
- Don’t waste early picks on rookies from good teams - they’re unlikely to get any game time.
- Don’t pick young ruckmen.
Broke both of those rules in one. Come at me, ■■■■■■■.
Pick 16. Oliver Florent (FC, Sydney)
Only broke one of the above rules this time, at least. Drafted mostly because I was hungry and thought I read Florentine.
Easily confused
Pick 24. Billy Stretch (C, Melbourne)
Picking young Billy this early was probably a bit of a… what’s the word? Ummm… reach. Yeah, it was a bit of a reach.
Pick 42. Kieran Lovell (FC, Hawthorn)
If this guy gets game time it means Hawthorn have had plenty of injuries. Swings and roundabouts, I guess. (Just for clarification, I love both swings and roundabouts.)
A misused metaphor
Pick 57. Zach Guthrie (B, Geelong)
Drafted mostly because of his name. I really rate players named Zach.
Pick 60. Jordan Gallucci (FC, Adelaide)
The only positive in this pick is that he’s slightly less speculative and less skinny than Zach Guthrie.
He looks happy here, but Zach Guthrie weighs only 3kg. Just $10 a month can help buy Zach the food he so desperately needs.
Pick 78. Harris Andrews (B, Brisbane)
You can never trust someone with two first names. Luckily, Harris only has one first name - his parents obviously just got the order wrong on his birth certificate.
Pick 96. George Hewett (F, Sydney)
A guy probably not in his team’s best 22 who averaged less than 60 last year. Yes please!
Pick 132. Jason Castagna (B, Richmond)
A promising player. Fully expect Richmond to ruin his development by May.
Richmond wouldn’t even know how to develop photos from a digital camera
Pick 149. Tyson Goldsack (B, Collingwood)
One of the worst players in the draft. Certainly not the worst, though - before the draft has even finished I can confidently say that @Birch19 won that with Simon White at pick 98. Well done Birch 
Highlight of the draft: still having no Fark Carlton players in my squad.