Best Simpsons Quotes








Homer: now son, on your first day of school, id like to pass on the words of advice my father gave me…
Abe: homer your dumb as a mule and twice as ugly, if a strange man offers you a ride, i say, take it!
Homer: Lousy traumatic childhood!!


“If elected mayor, my first act will be ta kill the lot of ya, and burn yer town to cinders!



When my Daughter was about 3 or 4 we were stuck in traffic and she came out with" come on, come on, we’ve got a body in the trunk"
What a good kid.


You’ll have to speak up I’m wearing a towel


Holding a football

“I know have 4 children, i will call you.stitchface”

Lenny: black!? Ugh thats the worst colour there is
Carl sitting right beside him
Lenny: oh sorry there carl
Carl: ah its ok i get it all the time


This thread always cheers me up after a loss


Ralph - Why do people run away from me? (Then wets his pants)


Willie teaching french class - Bounjoooouuuuuurrrrrr, ya cheese-eating surrender monkeys


Ever since the beginning of time, man has yearned to destroy the sun.


Best episode by far is the hank scorpio one.


I said make way for Willy ya blouse wearing poodle walker!!




Willie - “OOOOHHHHH, look I’m Milhouse!! I’ve tucked me shirt into me underpants again. I got no friends so I confide in Willie!!”


Krabappel? I’ve been calling her Krandall!?!? Why didn’t anybody tell me?!

Awww…I’ve been making an idiot of myself.



HAHA! I touched your heart!!


That’s the one.

One of my faves.

“Tell me more. I want to know all the constellations”.
" That one there is Jerry, the cowboy. And that big dipper looking thing is Alan…the cowboy".