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Actually NO it isn’t they are very different. Taking someone else’s life is very different than attempting to or a person taking their own life. For instance the amount of violence, stalking and intimidation is totally different and builds upon itself.
And; in this case we are talking about - this man planned this, it wasn’t just some spur of the moment decision or thought. And; as it happened, he got himself out of the car because he didn’t want to die, that way, so he stabbed himself instead. The two scenarios are different. That was his final fck you!
If we as a society want to effect change, we have to start teaching children and young adults in schools about violence, what it is, how it is perpetrated, what constitutes violence and it is never acceptable. People are not possessions. We cannot own people and yet some people think they can and they use control and intimidation as weapons to get their own way. The perpetrator grooms the person into a mould which fits their perception of how they think the person should be, not who they are or who they might be. If the person resists, violence is used against them to teach them how wrong they are on so many levels. Then it becomes the person’s fault if they are hurt for not obeying instructions and therefore the punishment is for, deliberately not conforming. The very worst part is not necessarily being hit, hurt, hiding the bruises and lying to those you love about what’s really going on but the waiting. Waiting for the drama to begin but not knowing when it will stop. The victim begins to break from the inside out, waiting. No one can live this way long term, mentally, emotionally and physically the body stays in full on flight/fight, the person becomes a nervous wreck. I don’t know which is worse, the torture of just waiting or, being punished and abused until the person conforms.
All the family and friends were also punished and that it is a life sentence.
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I’m sorry, but you can teach about violence all you like, and I am sorry about your personal experiences with it, I have my own experiences of it growing up, but this isn’t all about violence. There is a significant portion of this that is mental health, and somebody having a mental breakdown is not stopping to think, is what I am doing right or wrong. I am not defending this ■■■■■■■, by all reports he was a controlling turd who was manipulative and abusive before the separation. I in no way support this. If you and others in this thread can’t see this, then you can’t see it. My last comment on the subject.
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Yes, I get what you are saying and fortunately, not everyone takes their disagreements or frustrations this far but; sadly, there are some people, who do. I agree with you, there can be mitigating circumstances and mental health issues which tip some people over the edge but even then, the majority of people don’t main or destroy others, many of the suffering actually turn their frustration and suffering in on themselves.
In some ways, it may be a case of but for the grace of god go I, for all of us. None of us really know what we are capable of, until we are pushed or tested to our enth degree and placed in that position. I know I could never kill another person that moment came for me. I think it might have been the closest I will ever come to doing something terrible and inflicting violence on someone else with intent to hurt them badly. I know I would have regretted my actions for the rest of my life.
We need to keep communicating about these violent behaviours causing traumatic deaths because they rattle many of us, so that we never forget and may we all gain some understanding and compassion from what has happened.
This is about violence. This man from all reports was a violent bully. And by definition, a coward. Always was. Thats why she left him. He continued to be a violent bully. He continued to be a coward. His behaviour, like many of these violent bullying cowards, started long before the family law court or police got involved.
Its not a mental health issue. If it was he would have had mental health issues all his life. In fact IMO making it a mental health issue is a complete cop out.
And like many of these violent bullying cowards, he sees his partner and children as his possessions to which he has inalienable rights. Then one day one of those possessions says to him, you dont own me, you dont own these kids. And like the violent bullying coward he is, he doesnt like being told by anyone that he cant have all his toys anymore.
So if he cant have his toys, no one can, so he throws them out of his cot and destroys them.
This guy was always a violent bullying coward.
Lets call it for what it is.
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It’s worth reading, basically says the same thing.
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I get what you’re saying.
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Mental health may be an issue but it not in anyway an excuse
The fact that he saw violence and ultimately murder as options within his (potentially) unwell thinking is the issue. We must get to a point where people stop thinking violence is a means of expression or resolution to domestic issues. It is not an option.
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I have a mate whose dad murdered his mum in a similar fashion in the 1980’s. Once enough time had passed for us to raise what had happened with him, his explanation of events is as surprising today upon reflection as it was when first discussed.
The despairingly sad occurrence from earlier in the week proves two things. 1) Situations like this are nuanced and seldom black or white and 2) Not much has changed in 35 years.
No, it doesn’t.
It’s as abhorrent as any opposing view expressed, including but not limited to the investigating detective.
I feel for Rose Batty.
I do.
But what she went through does not give her the right to say violence is in every family, no matter how nice it might seem.
■■■■.
Off.
No.
It’s not.
It’s one thing to acknowledge there’s a legitimate problem but it’s completely another to say it’s s.o.p. for men.
It’s not.
And it’s really ■■■■■■■ offensive to, not suggest, but flat out say it is.
Fark that article and fark the person who wrote it.
And a very special fark that person for their ‘journalists have to report quickly’ Pilate act.
I see you writing.
I will quote if necessary.
I don’t see how you got that from the article, nor do i see how you got that Batty said violence is in every family?
Just to quote what was said:
And yet, as Rosie Batty reminded us when she too was caught in the crossfire of the media following the tragic murder of her son Luke, “Family violence happens to everybody no matter how nice your house is” It’s a generalized statement about how prevalent it is and that it can impact everyone at some point, not that every single individual is subject to it, or that people in your direct family have experienced it.
I would be really surprised if there is not one family, extended not necessarily direct, that hasn’t seen family violence of some sort. Even in my Christian sanitised white upbringing I saw it, my sister married a drunken wife basher and then dated a guy that nearly killed her (she divorced the 1st one and kicked the other one out).
I don’t think what Batty said was extreme and the statistics back it up from all the ones I have seen.
Violence isn’t always just killing someone, abuse, intimidation, mental disintegration are also factored in on family violence now.
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Well be friggin’ surprised.
So you know for 100% certain that all your extended family, all cousins, etc there is not one single person that has faced some sort of family violence, physical or otherwise? And are you 100% certain that they have all told you the truth or felt the desire to share what has happened to them?
It is a known part that a lot of women and children will hide what they face, for many varied reasons.
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Im 100% certain there’s one.
And I’m 100% ■■■■■■ off that that journalist and you assume there’s not on the basis of…
Fark.
All.
What? I think I need an interpreter for that sentence.
Get one.
reword it to
Family violence can happen to anybody no matter how nice your house is.
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Veeeeeery different statements.
Or you could pull back on the anger and explain your position with a little more depth.
Keep in mind, everyone has an opinion and just because you don’t agree with it doesn’t make it wrong.