Did you hear about the guy who dipped his balls in glitter?
Heh. Pretty nuts.
Why have you never seen an elephant hiding in a tree?
Because they’re really good at it.
Why do elephants paint their balls red?
So they can hide in cherry trees.
What’s the loudest sound in the jungle?
A giraffe eating cherries out of a cherry tree.
Keith Richards once got a turtle for his birthday. He asked: “How old will it get”. They told him: “About 300 years”. He said: “Now you see why I’m against it, you get attached to such an animal and then it dies.”
Mate down the pub told me to try horse manure on my strawberries. Farking horrible, I’m sticking with whipped cream.
Not really a joke but went to a players night with Cotchin and Riewoldt on the weekend (Cotchin doesn’t regard himself as a Brownlow winner, good bloke. Jack just regards himself as a winner, tosspot).
One of the more bleakly amusing tales was Adam Pattinson turned on the Eric Clapton hit “Cocaine” on Ben Cousins arrival at his first Richmond training session.
BENNY APPARENTLY WASN’T HAPPY WITH THAT ONE DARCE.
Fuckem. Let 'em ride on the nature strip.
There’s a crossover ramp just in front of the trailer 
