Things yer little uns say


Some hilarious takes on Christmas songs from my 6yo this season:

“Hey ho the missing toe…”

“So be good for good eggs ache…”



3yo gets up this morning and requests - “that song, ‘I am a patient boy, I wait, I wait, I wait’”.


He/she’s a keeper.

Get them into Repeater


He. And yep.


I’ve been indoctrinating the kids musical tastes for a while.

Got them watching the blues brothers for the car chases, then the music. They love the scene where they sing Rawhide at the hillbilly bar, but then I showed them the Dead Kennedy’s version and next thing I know we are listening to Jello Biafra with DOA.

The circle of life.


To add to this “I’m very angry that you’re doing this”

This being making her eat something for dinner.

She does however request the Essendon theme as a lullaby so we’re doing something right


It’s pretty sweet, actually. Sounds like you guys speak to her well :slight_smile:

When it gets to ‘Mummy, are you making good choices’? you know that childcare/kinda has taken over.


Junior singing that song from The Lion King: “hahkuna banana, it means no undies”


Asked miss almost 3 if she wanted to sing a song to her “baby sister” (currently pregnant). She chose the “Bombers Song”. I’ve never been prouder.


My kids are always making a mess at dinner, use their hands and then wipe them on their clothes. It drives me insane. Worse still if it’s food they don’t like they ham it up so they’re almost vomiting.

The other night I lost my ■■■■ and was blowing up about their eating technique. I asked ‘on what planet you two learned to eat like this?’

My son dead pan answers, ‘Uranus’

Not sure who laughed harder, my wife or the kids, but I was ■■■■■■ as. Made them eat the rest of their dinner without knife and fork.


Hear 3 yo., playing the other morning. “You broke the lawn, so you have to go to jail.”


Would love to see this hahaha


Upset 3yo Master Gillsy after sitting cross legged for too long: “I’ve got pins and noooooodles!”

Needles, mate, needles.


Telling my kids to eat without their knife and fork would be like punishing them by making them watch their favourite cartoons. And my oldest is nearly 10.


Well, I was conceding defeat.

If I catch them smoking cigarettes, they can smoke the whole carton…

Same age, 10 & 8. It’s like eating at some kind of zoo. Can’t wait to see these clowns go on their first date, they’re gonna wish they listened to me.




My 6yo has taken a liking to supplements (elderberry gummies) which we are taking hoping to ward off the flu. She is only allowed 2 per day which she consumed in the morning. Then, she asked for them again in the evening. My mrs told her “no, you had your share this morning” to which my daughter replies “no mommy, I did not. you are losing your mind.” all the while moving her index finger in a circular motion on her temple…


I’ll do you a deal - our kids are not allowed to date each other. The cleaning bill would be horrendous.


My kids refer to them as buzzy bees. “Oh No!! I’ve got buzzy bees in my leg”

Took me ages to figure out what the hell they were talking about the first time one them used it


Me: you can’t go out with bare feet
Miss almost 3: (with a look that said I’m being funny) no, only bears can.

Her first pun! She’ll be ready for blitz in no time.